Green Goblin Reviews: The Great Wall
I went into The Great Wall expecting to see a big dumb monster movie set in the Song dynasty of China, with Matt Damon headlining for some perplexing reason. This being Chinese director Zhang Yimou’s first attempt at creating a blockbuster for international audiences, it’s both a little silly and a little troubling that he felt the need to have a big generic western star as the main protagonist in a plot that primarily revolves around mythos, settings and customs all based on his native country. Thankfully, Mr. Yimou’s vision is one that allows for Damon’s inclusion into the plot with relative ease. It never feels forced, he never hogs the spotlight over other cast members (who all inevitably get their moments to shine) and any lingering implications in the back of your mind fade away once you actually begin the film proper. And what does the film look like when all is said and done? Well, it’s a big dumb monster movie set in the Song Dynasty of China with Matt Damon headlining. Surprise!!
So as I’ve previously stated, this film takes place during the Song dynasty. One of the biggest things to come out of the Song dynasty is the creation and implementation of gunpowder, which attracts the attention of various European mercenary bands over the years. Once such band attempts to make the pilgrimage East and are attacked in the night by an unseen creature, leaving only two survivors, who actually manage to kill the damn thing and slice off its foreleg. Those men are William Garin (Damon) and Pero Tovar (Pedro Pascal, of Game of Thrones fame); sellswords who hope to gain access to the mysterious black powder that creates fire from air and become wealthy on their return home. They are chased by a roving gang of bandits until they inadvertently run directly into a lookout post on the wall itself, manned by an armada of soldiers known as the Nameless Order. It’s here that they learn that that beast that had killed their companions was a scout, for an entire hoard of monsters known as the Touties that routinely attempts to invade the capital every 60 years or so and devours virtually everything in their path (imagine a four-legged version of the Shriekers from the Tremors franchise). They’re kept alive as their ability to slay one of these things is seen as an asset to their War Counsel, while they work from inside to try and sneak away with as much black powder as they can acquire. I’m sure you can guess the plot from here; the setup is basically the same as “the Road to El Dorado” without all the sacrilege or eventual genocide in the epilogue.
It’s odd, but the coolest aspect in this monster film isn’t the monsters. It’s the army. They’re all color coded with in brightly painted armor reminiscent of sentai gear and categorized by animals. Each is a given role to providing defense against the Toutie invaders, from archery to phalanxes to literally dangling over the edge of the wall with an axe and slashing at whatever manages to climb up. They each lend a hand in creating pretty kickass setpieces in every battle, with units operating in tandem with one another like a well-oiled machine. The troop you see the most of us the blue Crane unit, whose all-female rank is highly trained in the art of diving off the wall on a mechanized pulley system and basically sniping at the enemy with spears. Leader of this troop is Commander Lin Mae, played by Chinese actress Jing Tian whose rejection of William’s mercenary philosophy is what kickstarts the plot of Damon actually working with the Nameless Order to take on the hoarde, while Pero attempts to remind him why they came to the wall in the first place. There’s also great roll for Lu Han as a young rookie black Bear troop member who develops a bond with William after he saved his life and Willem Dafoe is on hand as Sir Ballard, a former English soldier who’s taken up residence at the wall some 25 years prior to our protagonists’ arrival. Honestly rock solid performances all around. Where the movie arguably drops the ball somewhat is on the monsters themselves. Though fairly fleshed out with an origin, breakdown of how they operate and weakness, the Touties still seem lacking as a primary antagonist. Mainly, I think it has to do with very the lack of diversity in their ranks in comparison to that of the army. And what little diversity they DO have is hindered by how similar they all look to one another. I feel that they may very well have benefited from some more contrast amongst them, similar to the graboids’ life cycle from the previously mentioned Tremors franchise or even the bugs from Starship Troopers.
It kinda sucks when a big dumb monster movie’s big dumb monster isn’t all that appealing, but when the protagonists make up for it with solid acting, a steady (if predictable) pace and legitimately good action, you tend to want to cut this film some slack. It’s not gonna blow your socks off, but it’ll keep you entertained for an hour and a half.
6.5/10
Not bad for a matinee, I’d say. I can think of less compelling reasons to head out to the theaters.